A word of caution: this post is not about an HR exit interview, its about life & relationships – or should I say, death & breakups. Some time back I started following James Altucher’s blog – his experiences with life, money & women are unmatched. Quite often his wife Claudia, a full-time yogi, writes on his blog. Last month she wrote about how she dealt with her mother’s suicide; the truth being that it never healed – she could never get it over. Perhaps, that’s always the case when someone leaves unexpectedly – without an alarm. The mind can’t stop questioning: what went wrong? could you have saved it? You know its not your fault, but probably you could have helped, done something differently. No matter what you do, the pain never really heals. Claudia confirms that there are options and means to deal with a suicidal feeling. But if you feel like learning anything from her experience, you don’t have to wait until you’re suicidal – apply it to other scenarios.
Go a step further, think twice before exiting someone’s life; at least part on amicable terms (as HR would suggest), and keep in touch. For once they can even helplessly accept death, but its much more tormenting for them to be ignored while you continue to exist. If you don’t like my advice, here‘s some from James, yes James Altucher – her husband (& a hedge fund manager), about diversifying your human capital portfolio: Never have your happiness dependent on a yes or no decision from one person. At the very least: diversify the people who are important enough to do that.
If you’re dealing with a situation or a surprise right now, don’t loose hope. Understand that (or watch the movie) Life is Beautiful or read about 32 ways to love yourself by Claudia.